Hey! Look! Listen!

I *heart* video games. Unusual, since I did not have video games growing up. Or maybe that's why I like them... the novelty hasn't worn off yet. When I was a tween, I saved up all my birthday and christmas money so I could buy a Gameboy and get the Legend of Zelda game (this was back in the mid-90's), cuz my friend had it. Well, that never came to be.

Fast forward a few years to a new town and a new friend who was playing the Legend of Zelda on the N64. I wished to partake, and my parental wouldn't let met get a Nintendo. Long story.

Fast forward a few more years and I'm in the dorms and my friend down the hall has a Game Cube, and I am indoctrinated into the cult of Resident Evil. I LOVED that game. I made my friends leave their room unlocked so I could go in there between classes and play. That's my next purchase: a GameCube so I can play Res Evil.

And a few years after that I borrowed a N64 from my gay friend Sam, and finally got to play Legend of Zelda. I made it to the castle before school and life forced itself to the top of the priority list and I never got to finish playing.

So imagine my child-like excitement when I found out Roomie owns a N64 and will bring it to the apartment for me. And even better, I won an auction on eBay last week for an original Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time game. It's like a missing piece of my life has finally fallen into place. And what have I learned from all this?

I fucking hate that fairy.

Link is the the most uncoordinated little toe rag I have ever seen. Who else falls off cliffs, bounces themselves off rock, and waves their sword in the wrong direction while zombies knaw on their backside? (Yes, I am still talking about LoZ) The boy without a fairy......... I snickered a little bit.

And I fucking HATE that fairy. Supid fairy floating around my stupid head getting in the way and saying stupid things that I already knew cuz it already told me once. Thank you Captian Obvious, Commander of Useless Information.

And that stupid princess sure gets kidnapped a lot. From what I know of the Legend of Zelda mythos (which really isn't much), and there's like half a million of these games, and Zelda gets kidnapped at least once in every game. Which really means that her guardian - Impo....Impa.... whatever the hell her name is - really, really sucks at her job. And in this glorious kingdom of Hyrule, isn't there some sort of standing army? CIA? FBI? Blackwater? There isn't a professional that can hunt her down? The fate of the heir to kingdom is left in the hands of the one weirdo semi-retarded kid? "The boy without a fairy" That's like, if Jenna Bush got kidnapped, and they sent the Kid Who Eats Paste to find her. Really?

Excuse me, I'm off to watch the end of My Big Fat Greek Wedding, and thanking God I have a small family and that I promised my mother I'd elope.

Cheers,
Alette

"If someone's trying to kill you, you try and kill 'em right back!" -Mal Reynolds, Firefly