Breakfast, with a side of aggrivated assault.

How many other's can say they get gas, breakfast and a front row seat to a skinny dude getting punched in the face till he passes out, all before 9 o'clock in the morning?

Ok, so technically I didn't see Skinny get punched. But I did step over his body lying prone on floor.
I pulled into the local Super America this morning to get gas. And of course I tried to pump before I paid and FUBAR'd the system. (That's a lot drive-off assholes! You've ruined my routine!) So wallet in hand I headed to the store to fetch some trans-fat-carb-processed-sugar goodness to pump into my body for breakfast. This huge scary black dude came out right before me, and held the door. I said thanks and ducked past, not looking directly at him. I've learned to not do that... you get shot, or hit in the face.

Diet Pepsi and gas station dough nuts in hand, I wound my way past the chip rack to the counter to pre pay for my gas, and lo and behold! There's a skinny black dude lying on the floor, fetal position, not moving. There were four people standing there staring at him, trying to see if he's dead or not. The manager was on the phone with the cops. I stepped over his legs and made my way to the counter to figure out what was going on. Oh, and pay for breakfast and gas.

Turns out Skinny was waiting in line. Scary Line-backer cut in front of him. Skinny made a fuss, and Scary finished paying for his orange juice, and then turned around and hit Skinny in face until he fell down and passed out.

I got the hell out of there as fast as possible. I didn't want to be there when Scary came back with a shot gun to finish what he started. As I was getting into my car the sheriff came flying in, Killer the Doggie in the back seat barking like a maniac. I contemplated walking over and saying "hi puppy!" But I probably would have died. Or gotten arrested. Which would have sucked either way.

Cheers,
Alette

"And if someone's trying to kill you, you try an' kill 'em right back!" - Firefly

Greetings & Salutations!

Ah, to blog again. A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away I had a blog titled "I don't suffer from insanity.." Unfortunately when my email account was hijacked by eBay bastards from Nigeria, my blog was lost as well. *tear*

The windows are open, my cat is sleeping on the sill, Andrew Zimmer is grossing the fuck out of me on the TV, I'm eating cool fresh cherries, and my new friend at AT&T is going to help me get a cheap BlackBerry. My love life is still a barren wasteland, but the bills are paid this month. Be glad for small mercies, I guess.

Back to that hijacked-by-Nigerian-terrorists blog. So many memories lost. And in the meantime life has a tendancy to move on. So here I am, freshly graduated from college, with three years of memories just waiting for a drinking bing to be forgotten.

I present for you now a new blog. Part memoir, part metafiction. The present and the past, together in one literary experiment, blended together until you don't know which is which, and it doesn't matter.

Cheers,
Alette

"The problem with people who have no vices is you can be pretty sure they have some pretty obnoxious virtues."